Sunday, December 22, 2024

No Happy Holidays for me



There was a post on Facebook yesterday about Happy Holidays being the correct greeting at this time of year; I would have gladly replied to that, but comments had been closed off. It’s probably better anyway for me to make my own, lengthier, post.

The words “Happy Holidays” are empty to me so I would never greet others that way. It's so generic, so non-specific! I live in India, where there are many religious festivals in the year, and every time, I join in the greetings. At present, where I live Hindus are still celebrating Deepam – you can see the fire on the mountain, which will burn on, visible for miles around, into Christmas. On the main Deepam day last week, everyone, Hindus and non-Hindus, were greeting each other with Happy Deepam. It was the same for Diwali, in October, and in January, we have Pongal, and it will be Happy Pongal, to and from everyone. 

Nobody asks what religion a person is; it’s the happiness of the festival that we wish each other. It doesn’t matter which word follows. Happiness is universal. Next week, Hindus will be greeting me with Happy Christmas, and I’ll greet them back the same way.

A generic Happy Holidays, supposedly to include all possible religions, it absolutely meaningless to me. It’s a cop-out in my view, a way to avoid actually figuring out what is being celebrated, and excluding oneself from any religious connotations, and feeling good about oneself for being inclusive. I believe it is the preferred greeting of atheists, but I’m not an atheist, though I was raised as one.

But anyway: the very word “holiday” is wishy-washy to me. It carries no depth. I realise that the Happy Holidays greeting originated in the USA and there, “holiday” means religious celebration. It doesn’t in British English, which is the language I grew up with. Holiday, in British English regardless of its etymology, simply means a day off work and school. So happy holidays, strictly speaking, in Britsh English just means, happy time off work and school. That’s why in British English, the word is always specific: school holidays, bank holidays, summer holidays. And as I am retired, every day is a holiday!

Now, we have Christmas holidays. Because traditionally, holidays off work and school are granted for Christmas. Three days off work for Christmas and Boxing days, and a few weeks off school.

Back to being inclusive: in the USA in particular, it seems Hanukkah is the second biggest religious festival in December. While I know and have known several Jews, I have no idea how or what day Hanukkah is celebrated; if I did know, I would wish them Happy Hanukkah on that day. But in the UK – where I lived for many years –Hanukkah is not at all a public festivity, unlike Christmas. Nobody knows when it occurs; it’s a private, not a public celebration.

But at Christmastime, the entire British world goes berserk! Everything, music, decorations, gift giving etc is centred around Christmas in the month of December. The generic “the holidays” means nothing; that’s the American version. In British tradition, it’s specifically Christmas holidays at this time of year.
But: surely children of other faiths must feel left out, if they are not allowed to participate in the purely secular festivities of Christmastime? Because they ARE mostly secular. Jingle Bells and White Christmas are secular songs. Coloured lights, images and banners are secular decorations. Christmas trees are secular. Gift giving is secular. I remember once looking for a Christmas card with a nativity scene on it – not a single shop had one! Even digital Christmas cards are mostly secular: scenes of snow and Santa and glasses of wine.

The Birth of Christ, the only non-secular part of Christmas, has diminished so much it’s really just a tiny, private part of the whole festivity, and practiced in private within families and churches. Nobody need know you’re a Christian. Nativity scenes are even banned in some British communities. Certainly in communal buildings, and I assume in schools. Christmas has truly gone secular. It’s not religious. It’s for everyone. It’s inclusive, judging by the contemporary symbols of Christmas.

I grew up in Guyana, a British colony in South America, and I remember how we used to drive around in the week before Christmas Day, looking at the way houses were decorated, and admiring and counting Christmas trees in the windows, pointing and exclaiming at the most beautiful lights and decorations. Every house had a tree. It seems to me that Hindus and Muslims - half the population - also put up trees. It was wonderful for children to see those trees! Surely anyone, regardless of religion, can put one up, if only for the kids, and give them gifts in the name of Santa? Don’t they feel left out, if Santa doesn’t bring them anything?

As an adult, I don’t really celebrate Christmas any more. I wrote a short nativity play for my daughter’s children’s’ school, and that’s it. I’m in India, and it will be just another day. My Hindu cleaning-lady asked me today why I don’t have any Christmas decorations up (Hindus LOVE decorations! As colourful as possible!) I had to laugh. I showed her a little tea-light holder with a star on it:”That’s it!” I told her. But on the day itself, I’ll be saying Merry Christmas to everyone I see, whether they are Hindu or Christian or something else, and they’ll say it back to me. That’s how it’s done here. I think that’s the best way.

Merry Christmas all! From my heart to yours!

 





Monday, July 22, 2024

The Story of Gita, Part Three: A Bird in the Home

 If you haven't read Parts One and Two, here are links:

A Bird on the Wire: Part One

A Bird in the Hand: Part Two

 After Gita and her mate abandoned the fan,  I really believed that was it. No more bird visitors.  I still
saw them, and heard them, and  they still came occasionally for mango snacks. But I knew there'd be  no baby chicks in the ceiling fan -- which, quite honestly, was a bit of a relief.



But once again, I was wrong.




The pause lasted about a week, and then they were back, flying around the place, inspecting everything.
They were looking for a new place to build a new nest.

They finally made a decision:  a blender!

It was an old blender that doesn't work, belonging to my landlady, which I had put on the fridge to be out  of the way. As ever, it started with increased visits, hopping around, and then bits of dry grass lying on the ground next to the fridge.

Mama bulbul was very busy building her nest, and this time I could watch her from not too far away. I could see her little head bobbing, tucking in the twigs, wrestling with particularly stiff bits of grass. 
(Sorry for the shakey camera -- put it down to excitement!)



The evidence was, of course, left on the floor for others to sweep up!




When she was absent, I climbed on a chair, and took a photo.      This is what I saw.
I was rather concerned. I'd forgotten there was machinery inside the blender. It looked very uncomfortable. But what did I know? She surely knew what she was doing. And she did.





The next morning, we had this. A perfectly round, beautifully crafted nest.
All done with only a beak.





Then began the most important time the laying of eggs
. She sat in her nest, hour after hour after hour. Every now and then, when she flew out to eat or stretch her wings, I had a peek.

First I saw this.

An egg!




And, the next day, just like the last time:

Two eggs!






But this time was different. Because, two days later, there was this:
Three eggs!


During all this time, Gita was completely unflustered by any activity in the kitchen. I'd come and go, open the frisge below her, clatter around on the countertop, wash dishes, and so did Shanti, my claeaning lady. Here's Shanti in the kitchen, with Gita quite happy in her nest.




Once she had laid the eggs, which took place over a period of three or four days, a new era started.

At the time of writing, that era is ongoing. We are on Day Six of her laying the last egg. 

Bulbul eggs take 12-14 days to  hatch. So we are all waiting.

She sits on th eggs almost all day, with several very short pauses. She returns for the night at around six pm, and sleeps on the eggs. She sleeps without moving all night long (I checked) and flies out between 5:45  and 6:30 am, returning very soon.

A few days ago, I had the idea to set up a mini camera to watch the process of hatching, and marvelling at the birth of three baby bulbuls. But I'd need help for this, so I bought a simple mini camera and sent out a call to the local community here and soon I had the perfect helper, Vinod. 

Vinod is an ecologist and has studied orthinology. He's as excited as I am, and is helping me set things up.

We've got the software in the camera, but there wasn't a suitable place to fix the camera so I've had a new idea, bought a new gadget, and when it comes tomorrow we should be all set for live-cam.

Watch this space!


Part Four is coming soon.



Sunday, July 21, 2024

The Story of Gita, Part Two: A Bird in the Hand

 If you haven't yet, you might want to first read Part One.

Short recap: a bulbul couple laid two eggs in a bush on my terrace, which had hatched.

Shortly after they flew the nest, I saw them fluttering around among the leaves. So checked it out,   and found this:



They had completely destroyed the nest! Which I thought a bit sad. It was such a perfect, beautifully crafted nest. A work of art,  considering it was made entirely with a beak.

And that seemed the absolute end to the story. I didn't see much of the birds after that, though they still came at least once a day for a mango snack, sometimes perched on a window bar, sometimes checking out the layout.

A few weeks after the birth, I noticed increased activitiy.  They were flying back and forth around the flat - which is open plan, with two bedrooms, three doors leading to a terrace and two balconies, and two windows which I opened during the day, for them to fly in and out. It seemed at first sort of a game. 
They'd perch on the window bars... 


...but they particularly liked to perch on the ceiling  fans, where they'd often just sit and chill, or else fly from fan to fan, as if checking out sofas for comfort.



Then one day, I noticed this beneath theceiling fan in the kitchen.


Bits of dried grass. On the left, around 9 am one morning.  On the right, a few  hours later.

Typical tenants, making a mess and not cleaning up afterwards!

 However, looking up, it was unmistakeable what was going on.

They were building a nest!


While delighted that they'd chosen my home, again, to build a nest, I was not as happy as with the terrace nest. Not only that it would not be possible to monitor what was going on in there, but they'd eventually leave behind a mess and I don't have a ladder to get up  there and clean it up. Not to mention not being able to use the fan  for a few weeks -- which doesn't matter, as I have other fans.

But not to worry. This went on for a few days, but then nothing happened. No more  vists to the  fan. Instead, they began showing interest in a second fan, in a bedroom I don't use., flying up there and hopping around, in and out the window etc. Then they stopped that as well.

They still came for snacks. They still flew around outside, still perched on the wires outside the house.




But they seemed to have completely lost interest in the fans, and the nest they had carefully built up there. 

One day around this time, I heard some screeching and when I checked the living room, I saw a small bird trapped inside the window. The glass was closed (it's often open) and the bird was flinging itself opelessly against it. I reaslied that it was a baby bird. And right outside, on the wire in the photo you see above, were both parents, clearly panicking, as they could not help the baby.

I managed to slide back the glass and the chick escaped on to the balcony beyond. However, the balcony has a glass balustrade, and it kept fluttering wildly, trying to fly out through the glass, bumping into it, and falling back onto the floor. It couldn't figure out how to fly up and over the top. 

Meanwhile, the poor parents were frantic, not knowing how to help, and probably more distraught at seeing me there, so close to their pracious little one. They were screeching and flying around, hopping about  in desperation. All three were clearly terrified.



Inside, looking out forlornly.


'Mama! Papa! I'm trapped! Help!'



'There's a monster lady and she's going to eat me up! Help!'

Eventually I decided on tough love. I picked up the bird and lifted it up above the balustrade, and it flew away to join the parents.

For a few seconds, I held her in my hand!

 Then they were all gone.

The interesting thing about this episode is that this baby bird seemed too big  to be  one of the ones which has hatched about two weeks previously. They grow so quickly -- quadrupled in size from birth to a week later. This one was bigger, but not nearly full size. Was it one of the two? If so, where was the other one? Mum and dad were clearly still in charge.

That bird in my hand, was it the original Gita, or Gita's son/daughter, or a new Gita altogether?

This young bird came to my home on July 3rd.

Gita's hatchlings flew the nest on June 14th. This little bird looks older than two weeks, to my very amateur eyes - based only on the growth rate I had noted in Part One.
Those chicks had both obviously flown away, unaided, that day. Surely by now they would know how to fly up more steeply, to cross over the balciony balustrade?

It's a mystery. If you know the answer, please leave a comment below.

I'll have to ask Vinod when I see him next. I'll introduce Vinod in the next episode.
Because the story might seem to have come to its natural end -- but it hasn't.

Part Three: A Bird in the Home
























Saturday, July 20, 2024

The Story of Gita, Part One: Bird on the Wire

 

At present, I'm sharing my home with a family of birds: red-vented bulbuls, to be exact, a common species in India, where I  now live. It's an ongoing journey and very fascinating. I've been  posting updates on my Facebook page, but I decided to collect them ,all together here so the stages of the journey can be read chronologically.

So. It all began  with a plant: a diffienbachia bush, which is almost a small tree. This  was given to me in February, and it became my first plant in what is to become, hopefully, a terrace garden.


Here it is, just as it was then:



Soon after installing it in a corner of the terrace, I noticed a pair of birds flattering around on it and in it. They were flapping  around on the railings of the terrace as well, flying back and forth between the trees outside and my terrace.

I was able to identify them as red-vented bulbuls.

Here's one of them. Isn't she a beauty? You can see the red patch on her underside, which gives this species its name.


I gave her the name Gita, which means Song in Sanskrit. Bulbuls are generally known for their beautiful voice; they are sometimes called the nightingales of India. I knew this, but never actually heard a live bulbul before  -- though I had mentioned them in some of my novels. I actually had When the Bulbul Calls as an alternative title to one of my novels, once!

By now I had downloaded the Merlin app on my phone, by which you can identify birds by their photos or their calls. And very soon, amid the cacophony of birdsong that greeted me every dawn, I occasionally heard the bulbul call. It's definitely not as beautiful as a nightingale's song -- which I have heard, live -- but it has a very distinctive tone. A purity, which seems to touch me in a very deep place. And it wasn't long before I could not only identify that call, but the moment I heard it in the medley of different calls, I'd feel a jolt of the heart - there! That's my Gita!

Although actually it could very well not be Gita. It could be her mate, whom I called Vayu, Wind. Bulbuls, I learned,  mate for life, and males and  females are so alike they are almost indistinguishable. The males might be slightly bigger, but you could only tell if you seem them both together.

Anyway, mine almost always came with her mate,  and I ended up calling them both Gita, if they were alone, because it is Gita who plays the star role in this story; and she was the friendllier of the two. I'd put pieces of mango on a stool for her and sit on the balcony, and she's come quite close, then fly down and eat. 

I hadn't been paying much attention to what they were actually doing in the diffienbachia, though I did notice bits of dry grass around the pot. I wasn't aware of what this meant. And then, one day, I found this:



Hidden among the leaves, a perfect little nest! It was in the form of a small cup, very neatly built.
Meanwhile, the birds came and went. Bulbuls, I learned, are gregarious birds, and sometimes quite tame, and live comfortably with humans. 

 This  one at least seemed undaunted by my presence on on the terrace. We all lived together on the terrace, one big happy family.

 Ready and waiting...

...for, a few days later, this:


an egg!




And then, the following day:

Two eggs!




Gita and Vayu were parents! Well -- egg parents, parents-in-waiting. I was as thrilled as they were -- and they were thrilled. Both of them were in attendance; one of them (I always assumed it was Gita, but it seems the male also helps to hatch) was almost always sitting in the nest, keeping the eggs warm and cosy. Now and then neither of them was there, and that's when I  sneaked up to get a photo.  Day and night, they watched over the eggs. One of them was always there overnight, sleeping on the eggs. During the day, if one was on the eggs, the other was invariably nearby, perched on the terrace rail, or on anearby tree, watching, waiting. Day after day, they sat there, completely still, waiting, waiting
well hidden among the leaves.







And then one morning, I knew. I just knew! Such a fluttering and flattering, such a chattering and chirping, such a commotion. Both of them so excited! And so was I. I knew what had happened, but of course, I couldn't go near that nest to see inside.

And then, while both were away, I stealthily moved aside the leaves, and saw this:



Thus began the most exciting time of all. Back and forth they flew, bringing food for their chicks -- they are fed insicts, I learned, and the parents kill the insects before feeding the chicks. They also keep the nest clean by eating the droppings. They are most vigilant; never far from the nest, both of them coming and going and most concerned about their babies.

The babies grew. I was careful not to approach the nest from the front, but the diffienbachia was directly in front of a large window in my living room, and between me and the nest was really only a few leaves and a wire mesh. I cut away one of the bigger leaves so that I could see into the nest, watch the chicks developing. I'd see their little heads over the side of the nest, their tiny beaks open wide, the parent dropping bits of food into those hungry little throats. I could even hear a soft cheeping.

 But of course due to the mesh there wasn't a good view, and the photos I managed to take were unclear.

But when they were a few days old, I managed to get this, from the front:



And a few days later, this:






How quickly they were growing... In the photo above, they were barely a week old, yet fully feathered, and so big they filled that nest. I wondered what happened when there were three or more eggs -- how would they even fit? 

I began to dream. I imagined the hatchlings learning to fly, falling out of the nest, giving me the chance to feed them  by hand, even hold them in my hand. I had seen videos of this  happening, and was looking forward to the clumsy flapping of wings, the stumbling on the ground, that first feeble flight. 

But then, one morning I went out and this is what I found:



No, this is not the first "empty nest" photo I posted above. The nest was really empty. My chicks had flown the nest!

So this is what Empty Nest Syndrome feels like...

I have to admit, I felt bereft. Where was my bulbul family? How were they managing, out there in  the wild, wild world? How would they survive, with all the predators around - crows in the sky, chipmunks in  the trees, cats and dogs on the ground, if they fell? How would they cope with wind, and rain?  Where did they sleep at night? All the worries of a concerned grandmother.

But most of all, I missed Gita. I missed her fluttering around the terrace. She still came, but very occasionally. I was able to lure her and Vayu to hang around by placing snacks out for them -- slices of mango, and other fruit. I soon learned that they only liked mango -- they refused my offerings of banana and pawpaw, so in the end I only gave them mango. Gradually, they began to come back. I'd place  the stool in the doorway, and inside the living room, and they'd come and eat every day.

Here they are, enjoying a midday snack.



 Again, I noticed that one was less cautious than the other. Also, one chatters more than the other - the male, Vayu. He would sit on a wire outside and chatter, while Gita would be in the house enjoying her mango.
Maybe he disapproved. Maybe he thought it was dangerous. Gita didn't care. She kept coming, and I was happy. It was nice to have a pet who made no demands except a daily slice of mango. They didn't even leave droppings.  So once again, we were a happy family. I loved having them around. They were always together, sitting on the wire outside, or on the veranda railing. 

And every now and then I'd hear that wondrous voice, filtered out from the cacophony of birdcall every morning. Not very often, but the rarity of it was the great pleasure. Hearing it would lift my heart.

And that, I thought, was the end of the story.

But it wasn't.































































Wednesday, November 30, 2022

Tulasa, 12 years old. Sold into prostitution in Bombay.

 Interview with Dr Gilada

by Sharon Maas

This interview was conducted in 2004, in conjunction with the publication of my novel Peacocks Dancing (later republished as Lost Daughter of India.)
An old story that never grows old. How can men do this?

Dr Ishwarprasad Gilada, founder, General-Secretary and driving force behind the People’s Health Organisation in India, has been fighting against the horrors of the Bombay sex trade for the last two decades.

Sharon: Your crusade against child prostitution in India began with the rescue of Tulasa in 1982; back then, the story made front page headlines in India and Nepal, and opened a viper’s nest of horrors. Who was Tulasa?

Dr I.G.: Tulasa was a 12 year old Nepali girl who in 1982 was kidnapped from her village and sold into prostitution in Bombay. She was systematically raped to make her fit for the trade and then forced to entertain an average of 8 clients a day. I met her 10 months later in the Bombay hospital where I was working at the time. Her tiny body –the body of a child – was completely broken. She was suffering from three types of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs), genital warts and brain tuberculosis which left her spastic and wheelchair-bound, and finally killed her. The story she told was horrific. The People’s Health Organisation embarked on a full-fledged “Save Tulasa” campaign, and with the support of the media managed to rescue her. We located her father – her mother had died shortly after her disappearance – and sent her home.

Sharon: You say with the support of the media. Didn’t the police help in the rescue campaign?

Dr. I.G.: Police collusion with the flesh trade was a high point of Tulasa’s revelations. Even today the police and the politicians are in collaboration with the pimp – the profit is huge. Back then, the uproar generated by her story forced the police into action, and in no time 32 persons involved were arrested, including the three brothel owners Tulasa had worked for. The police knew exactly what was going on, and only stepped in when forced to do so. It took them 18 months to ascertain her age and three years to file a charge. And only last January, 18 years later, did the case finally to come to trial. The police were given a month to produce her in court. Only then did we receive a message that Tulasa died two years ago. Meanwhile, her abusers have been running free.

Sharon: After her rescue didn’t she find peace in Nepal?

Dr I.G.: No. At first there had been an outpouring of sympathy for her – offers of adoption and marriage, an invitation to Switzerland, gifts of money and medicine. None of it came to much. Tulasa was rejected by her father’s second wife, and moved into a home. Her father avoided her to keep the family peace. She was in constant pain, but worst of all was the feeling that nobody loved her, that she had been used and abused and finally discarded like a piece of rubbish.

Sharon: Is Tulasa’s story typical of child prostitutes in India’s megacities?

Dr I.G.: Yes. Soon after Tulasa’s rescue the air was abuzz with innumerable stories of girls who were caged and treated like animals in Kamathipura, Bombay’s infamous red-light district. They narrated harrowing tales of torture and abuse. The PHO has rescued more than 130 girls to date directly, and more than 3000 indirectly. The youngest girl we rescued was only eight years old.

Sharon: Has the trafficking with children in Bombay improved since Tulasa’s rescue?

Dr I.G.: Horrifying as it is, Tulasa’s case has had some positive fallout. The episode threw light on the appalling practice of child prostitution - the public outcry was tremendous. As a result, the governments of India and Nepal signed a treaty for the rescue and repatriation of Nepali girls from Indian brothels. In India the sentence for trafficking with minors has been hiked from 7 to 13 years. Child prostitution has been reduced by about 40%.

Sharon: How do children end up as prostitutes in India?

Dr I.G.: About 40% of all child prostitutes have been abducted from villages all over India and Nepal. They are lured away on some pretext or the other: going to movies, cities, temples, making them film stars, lucrative job opportunities, marriage. Another major source of child prostitutes is the Devadasi system. Every year thousands of girls are ceremoniously dedicated to the Goddess „Yellamma”. They are sold to the highest bidder and after a brief period of concubinage turned over to the urban brothels. The system is officially banned but continues to operate clandestinely, contributing up to 20% of urban child prostitutes.

A small proportion of child prostitutes come to the trade after being raped. Others run away from incestuous relationships with family members. Yet others are daughters of prostitutes, who have no other option than to follow their mothers’ profession.

Sharon: What are their living conditions in the brothels?

Dr I.G.: The girls live in unimaginable squalor, usually about 10-12 girls in a small room. The brothels are foul, stinking holes, often overrun with rats and vermin. They eat from filthy cafeterias or vendors, and have to pay twice the price for their food and other necessary commodities. Most of them are forced to abuse drugs, alcohol and nicotine. 75 to 80 percent of the girls suffer from STDs. More than half of the girls are HIV infected.

Sharon:. What is the PHO doing to deal with the situation?

Dr I.G.: The prevention of child prostitution and the containment of AIDS are two of our main aims. We have a Mobile Clinic – donated by a German organisation - and go out into red-light districts several times a week with a team consisting of health workers, social workers, and ex-sex-workers. We distribute free condoms, and provide medical check-ups and counselling on specific health or social problems. In many of the brothels there are prostitutes working for us, helping to educate others so as to prevent the spread of AIDS. We have had considerable success in this area.

Sharon: What success have you had with your other main aim, the prevention of child prostitution? Is it possible to rehabilitate the children you rescue from the brothels?

Dr I.G.: At the moment, the emphasis is on prevention rather than rescue. The problem is, where can they go after they have been rescued, or when they contract AIDS and are thrown out of the brothels? They are often rejected by heir communities and families and cannot return home, and we simply do not have the facilities to look after these girls. We have a 25 acre plot of land on the Bombay-Goa highway, where we had planned to build a home for rescued children, a training centre and a school – but we simply don’t have the funds to carry on. The PHO operates on a shoestring.

Saturday, June 18, 2022

Jonestown: Drinking the KoolAid


19 November 1978: It was my French teacher at the Alliance Française in Paris who first broke the news. “Something terrible has happened in your country,” said Mr Beaulieu at the start of the class, but he didn’t say what. I found out later, like everyone else who read about the almost ghoulish events of the night of the 18th.

Suddenly, Guyana was on the world map. Every Guyanese who has travelled abroad knows the annoying response of foreigners when they first hear the name of your country: “Oh, I’d love to go to Africa!” or some other sentence placing it in the wrong continent.

But now, in November 1978, the whole world knew where and what we were: a little backwater South American country covered in jungle, so remote from modern civilisation that this "bunch of crazies" – and a huge bunch it was too, a thousand all told! – had chosen it to recreate paradise, a paradise that had turned to hell. The photos of hundreds of dead bodies steaming in the rainforest shocked the world.

Jonestown became a code word for every movement that goes off-track; in this case, lethally so.  It was the world’s first mass suicide. In reality it was a massacre; a slow one, created by systematic brainwashing.

They must have been crazy, the world thought, and the world’s media dissected the story and analysed it and probed into the reasons and the motives and the background trying to explain it to themselves and everyone else, and after all of the  cogitation, the only answer they could come up with at the time was the same they had started with: they were a bunch of crazies. Nothing else explained it. Over the years, more and more truths have emerged, though, and we can look at the tragedy with a little more discernment.

Like everyone else I was fascinated, but even more so: this had happened in my own country, not far from  where I too, with a bunch of drop-out friends, had started a commune in the middle of nowhere a few years previously. My friends, in fact, still lived on the farm we had founded. What if? What if I’d still been there and had known these people, these Americans; met them in the early days, before things went so very wrong? After all, we all had the same idea, didn’t we? Escape from a civilisation which, in our eyes, was going so very wrong? When Jonestown's White Night, the night of death, happened,  I tried to understand.

Though I’ll never understand how mothers could poison their own children, I did understand how a beloved leader could turn from saviour to mass murderer. Because to me it was, finally, no longer mass suicide but mass murder. My own background and experience made it all perfectly logical: right up to the final fiasco.

You see, I know first-hand what, in the beginning, drove people to Jim Jones. Everything I have read on the subject suggests to me that Jones started off as a true humanitarian, a charismatic leader, a man of caring and goodwill, a friend of and fighter for the poor and downtrodden. And I, as a young adult, was a seeker, in quest of just such a leader. Someone who could show me a way out of my misery, guide me to a better, more wholesome life. There is nothing wrong with such a longing. It is a healthy need, a natural hunger.

I grew up in Guyana. As a child of divorced middle-class parents, I had a muddled if basically happy childhood. Guyana was a wonderful place to grow up in back then, as anyone who shared that background will agree: Georgetown, an overgrown village, lush and green, a tree-shaded haven where everyone knew everyone else, or at least everyone else’s aunty or second cousin. The Interior was untouched nature, mysterious and vast. Guyana would have been paradise, if not for the political turbulences.

My parents were political, progressive, liberal, leftist. My father, indeed, was a Marxist, for many years Press Secretary to the controversial Opposition Leader Cheddi Jagan. My mother was a leading feminist during feminism’s dawn, an icon of Progress. I grew up with all the “right” ideas on social progress. But something was missing.

My parents were also atheist, and I was raised to be the same; but in the contrary way of 18-year-old youth, I turned away from atheism and embarked on my own spiritual quest. It was a desperate and genuine search, for the political and social theories I’d been raised on could not quench the hunger I felt deep inside: that was spiritual, and could not be satisfied with intellectual explanations. Had Jim Jones come along at the time not only with his social reforms but also showing me a path to God, who knows: I might have been his, heart and soul.

I was luckier than those who did fall for his charisma. My spiritual interests eventual led me along a different path, one that led eastwards, to India and Yoga and the teachings known as Sanatana Dharma. I lived in India for a while, in a place steeped in genuine Vedantic spirituality and wisdom, and there I found the key to the missing Factor X of my life. It had been inside me all the time, and the practice of Dhyana, meditation, taught by a highly experienced and reputable teacher, brought me the inner stability and confidence that had thrown me again and again in my younger days.

Over the years my personal bullshit-detector developed nicely; I can now tell the wheat from the chaff, the Pied Piper teachers (and there are hundreds of them!) from the genuine ones almost at the moment they open their mouths. But how different it could have been had I, as a young, eager, naïve and spiritually hungry teenager, stumbled across the wrong teacher! One driven not by the selfless need to lift up others, but by a power-hungry ego? One out to make a fortune? One who seduces his devotees, especially young, pretty, female ones? Would I, in my youthful naivety, have noticed that moment when things began to go wrong? Or would I have been drawn into the web of deceit, manipulation and control that surrounds such teachers? When I hear some of these stories I often think, there but for the Grace of God, go I. I’m not at all certain I could have peeled myself away in time.


And that’s why “the bunch of crazies” label used to describe the Jonestown victims has never sat well with me. These were hungry people desperate for real food, hungry for spiritual nourishment -- just as I had once been. Along came a charismatic leader, wrapping them with affection and goodwill and giving them a sense of security and family; we call it love-bombing for a reason. Love is addictive – and very easily faked. These people were sponges for love, but were given a pseudo-deal, offered by a man who used them to develop his own power and dominance over them -- as power-hungry men (and women) tend to do.

We are not trained to tell the difference. We cannot see it, feel it, taste it. Fake meat, I’m told, tastes very much like the real thing. There’s a huge market for fake cheese, and to those who’ve never tasted a true Brie or Gruyère, developed a palate for the genuine thing, fake cheese might even be delicious. And therein lies the danger.

Unless we can put ourselves in their situation – not the situation in November 1978, but the situation years before – we have no right to judge. These people were like the legendary frog in slowly heating water; unable to jump when the water turned hot. It was a case of slow brainwashing. The ability to discern comes only through experience and the passing of time; the ability to stand back and say, wait a minute. Something’s wrong. For most of the over 900 victims who died at Jim Jones’ bidding, it was like being slowly blinded with one veil after the other; their sight for truth growing dimmer as time went on, so that in the end they were completely blind.

Today we’d call it mass psychosis. There are many other examples: Branch Davidians (Waco), the Manson Murders, the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Jim Jones used mental and physical abuse, blackmail, humiliation, and threats to break down the members of his community to get them to do his bidding. He convinced them that he and he alone was their redeemer. Peoples Temple was no longer a church; it was a cult with Jim Jones at its helm as their saviour, with those who weren’t persuaded simply too terrified to leave.

Even close family members were told to spy on each other. Anyone expressing doubt or rebellion could be denounced by friends or relatives. Extreme punishments were the order of the day, such as electric shocks and being locked in an underground box. Many had to sign blank power of attorney forms and false confessions to crimes, including child molestation and abuse. Children were beaten and removed from their parents. Jim Jones was their saviour who had to be obeyed absolutely.

This is the horrific process I wanted to highlight in my novel, The Girl from Jonestown. I wrote it many years ago under the title White Night, precisely with the question in my mind: how could this happen? Could it have happened to me? For fifteen years, I tried to get that book published, with varied results. One literary agent from a major US agency loved it and even found an editor at a major publisher who also loved it – but it was rejected at the critical sales and marketing team meeting. Another top US agent asked for the manuscript after reading the first few chapters – but in the end turned it down without ever reading it: “after all, we know the outcome.”
Yes, we do. But this novel is not about outcomes, (and anyway, the “mass suicide” does not end the book). It’s about understanding. It’s about compassion. It’s about being able to learn from what happened and then promise ourselves: I will always keep my eyes open, always look to the messenger as well as the message. Who is behind it all? Money, sex and power: one or more of those three are always the motivating factors when it comes to cultish abuse. With Jim Jones, it was all three.

And so we all need to stay awake and aware. We need to be able to see through the inviting cult propaganda to the naked and unpleasant truth beneath. It’s about self-preservation: waking up in time to spot the rot. I hope this book will help a few people to open their eyes. To be aware.
 


Sunday, April 24, 2022

Return to Gaschurn, Sixty Years Later. Part Two. Haus in der Sonne

 Continued from Return to Gaschurn, Part One

Up, up, up along the winding road into the mountains, and there we were. The village was nothing like I remembered it; but then, I remembered very little, at the most those quaint solid-wood chalets. I kept an eye out for Haus in der Sonne while driving through, but as I'd suspected it was long gone; yes, I'd looked it up online and no Pension of that name existed. The buildings in the village centre were modern, of brick, with a few chalets in between and on the hillside above. 


I wasn't quite sure what I was doing in Gaschurn. Retracing my steps, yes; but how? I didn't know a single person there, and I didn't have a plan. I needed a plan.  Haus in der Sonne had to be central to that plan. I also needed a hook; how would I explain myself?


On the way up it had all seemed pretty clear. My plan would be to find someone, an older person who remembered Haus in der Sonne, and to have a chat about the old days. The hook would be the photograph. This one, found again after rummaging through a shoebox of old photos.

I remember that pullover well: Mrs Williamson had knitted it for me, and I loved it. Here I am, gazing up into the mountains that so impressed me at the time. It can’t have been cold as I wasn’t wearing a jacket, or gloves, or a cap. To my surprise, up there wasn’t very cold at all.



And so, armed with just a photo, I put my plan into motion. I needed to meet someone, an older Gaschurner, but as we parked the car and stepped out into the street it seemed a vain hope: the street was empty. Not a single person in sight. And so my first reaction was disappointment. Had I come all this way in vain?

I hadn't planned a 2022 return to Gaschurn. It seemed that the stars had all aligned to bring the visit about organically.

My son had been working on a farm just outside the Austrian town of Dornbirn, which is the largest city in the Austrian state of Vorarlberg, close to the Swiss border.
Now, in March 2022, he had quit his job and needed to return home to Ireland; which meant packing all his belongings into his car and driving back to Ireland through Switzerland and France. He'd then take the Cherbourg-Dublin Ferry. A very long and exhausting drive, and he'd been ill. Someone to drive back with him, to take the wheel now and again, would be an enormous help.

It was the opportunity I'd been waiting for...

Vorarlberg. Yes, that memory popped up: crisp outline of white mountains against a brilliant blue sky, snow glistening in the sunshine. My son loved Vorarlberg. His reaction to the beauty of those mountains, that sunshine, that sky, was similar to mine: a beauty so intense tears would come to his eyes.



Gaschurn was not even an hour's drive from Dornbirn. The time had come to return. So one sunny morning we did; and here we were. I was back. 

Now, as we left the car. the village seemed deserted. We had parked in front of the Tourist Information office, but even that was closed. We set off to meet someone, anyone.

Walking along the empty main village street: nobody. Not a soul in sight. I knew that in Germany and Austria the Mittagspause, midday pause, is almost a holy thing: the shops close down as people take their precious lunch break; lunch being the biggest meal of the day.

But there was nobody on the street. Strange, I thought. Where is everyone? I thought this was a major tourist resort these days?

Finally we did spot someone, a young man with a backpack. We spoke to him; it turned out he was an English tourist. He pointed us in the direction of a restaurant, down the road that led into the valley. 'That's also where you can get the cable car up to the mountain,'  he said. We parted company, and made our way to the restaurant, a modern pizzeria. Perhaps there I'd meet the "older person" who would answer my questions; questions I hadn't  properly formulated, not even to myself. As usual, I was in ‘play it by ear’ mode, but by now slightly frustrated.

We went into the restaurant and ordered drinks, and while doing so I addressed the staff member behind the bar. 'Do you know of any older person from Gaschurn?' I asked. 'Someone who has lived here a long time?'

The barman, who turned out to be Albanian, pointed to a man sitting alone at a table. 'Talk to him,' he said. So we sat down at that table.

 I pulled out my photo and showed it to him. 

'Do you recognise the place where this photo was taken?' I asked.

 He looked at it for a while, and then he said:

 'Yes. This was taken at the Silvretta lake dam.’ He pointed to something in the photo: ‘See: there's the dam wall.'

As soon as he said it, another memory opened up. That word 'Silvretta': it rang a loud bell loud and clear, and suddenly it all came back to me: yes, we had been up to the Silvretta Lake, Mrs Williamson and I. That's where the photo had been taken.

So finally I had my older person; but he wasn’t quite old enough. ‘Do you know of a pension called Haus in der Sonne?’ I asked. ‘That’s where we stayed in 1963.’

‘Wait a moment,’ he said, and whipped out his phone, dialled. ‘Can you come to the pizzeria?’ he said into the phone, and then, ‘now. Right now.’

Within minutes, another man turned up at our table. The first man introduced us; his name was Mr Tschofen.

The first man told the second man of our mission. ‘They are looking for someone who knows Haus in der Sonne!’ he said.

‘My parents used to own that guest house!’ said Mr Tschofen, and my jaw dropped to the floor in the biggest Wow! of the day, of the holiday.

And so I had found my connection. Mr Tschofen could tell us all we wanted to know. His parents had owned the building; before becoming a pension in the early 60s it had been a Kindererholungsheim, a health-restoration home for children needing rest and recovery: Germanic culture is excellent at that sort of thing.

Next, Mr Tschofen whipped out his own phone and, opening his photos, showed us an album full of the pre-pension Haus in der Sonne, complete with the children having their holiday. And so I made the connection to the past. Mr Tschofen is younger than I am so he would not have encountered me on that 1963 trip, but he had stories to tell and he turned out to be the missing link I had come here for. The circle had closed.



There were photos of the children playing outside the house, and getting ready to ski



Mr Tschofen’s photos of Haus in der Sonne brought it all back: yes! That was where we’d stayed, Mrs Williamson and I. I remembered the rack for skis at the side of the house. I remembered the lobby, the stairs, the massive wooden walls, the wood-burning stove…




He even had a photo of the kitchen. It was all there!



 We sat and chatted with the two men for a while and then, on their advice, walked down to the bottom of the valley and that was where we found the people. Not only shops that were open– a supermarket, a tourist shop, a ski-equipment shop – but the cable car office and, most importantly, people, swarms of them, all in their winter-sport gear and many of them carrying skis on their shoulders.

We parked the car in a huge car-park that was so full we had trouble finding an empty slot.                                                                           We bought cable-car tickets and rode the bubble up to the top of the mountain, a journey that seemed endless. All around us snow-covered slopes, people skiing down them, people on skis being dragged up in order to ski down again.



There at the top we found the people, and the party. This was why the village was empty. There’s a  restaurant up there; the outside tables were packed full and loudspeakers blasted out loud, energetic music. The sun shone brilliantly into a cloudless blue sky.

 The view was spectacular:  miles of white fields undulating into the distance, dotted with what looked like moving insects, but was actually people, people on skis, people sidling up and sliding down the slopes.


However, this wasn’t the Silvretta Lake; it was Montafon, the skiing area just above Gaschurn. Silvretta, where I had been as a child and where the photo had been taken, was further down the valley, accessible with a different cable car. 


                                                                  
                                                                        We didn’t stay long up there. 

Not being a fan of loud music, I had no inclination to join the partying guests at the restaurant. I’d have preferred the silence of the mountains; after all, I had come to make peace with the place, and peace is to  be found in silence rather than noise. But I did have my photo taken:
 Gaschurn, Sixty Years Later.

But peace can also be found within. Just being here, meeting two friendly men who could reconnect me with the past, had done the trick. The ghosts of the past were finally dispelled. Who cared what had happened in 1963? That was another time, another culture, another era. This was now, and Gaschurn, the mountains that surrounded it, the vast blue sky and the pristine white of the valley, had done their cleansing work. I was free.

As we drove away I saw the modern day Haus in der Sonne. It is at the entrance to the village, next to the police station. I would have stopped to take a photo, but my camera was out of charge. That seemed somehow right.