A few weeks ago I made this blog private, only visible to those with invitations, and invitations only going to other writers.
I suddenly got paranoid. I thought of all the mistakes I've made in publishing, some foolish, some risky, some possible downright self-destructive, depending on how the next few weeks, months and years pan out.
I thought of the editors currently reviewing my manuscript.
I thought of the one who currently loves it (YES!) ; loves it enough to send it to the editorial board of Ballantine, Random House.
That's where it's been ever since.
What if They (They of the editorial board) read this blog? They'll think I'm a loose cannon! So, that's the reason I privatized it.
So if you came here in the last few weeks and found yourself locked out, I apologize (but then you wouldn't be reading this would you? Unless I've invited you back in). It wasn't personal. It was just my paranoia.
And then, things in my personal life weren't going so well.
They still aren't.
I did the equivalent of jumping into bed and pulling the blanket over my head; I more or less withdrew from the blogosphere.
But hiding in a cocoon of self-pity didn't do me any good, so here I am again: that ms is still out there, and news could come at any moment of any day. That news may be good, it may be bad, but whatever it is, I'll just keep on trucking.
What choice have I got?
Welcome back, me!